Wednesday, September 9, 2009

King Mrgl-Mrgl's Back to Sea School Address

Source: King Mrgl-Mrgl's Castle

Kneel all my Murloc Subjects!
How have you been surviving? We are addressing you today as you prepare to return to Sea School.We have subjects tuning in from all over Azeroth on their video shell phones and we are glad they have lived long enough to tune in.

I know that for many of you, this will be your first day in defensive school and for others you have progressed to offensive school. And for those of you starting Tadpole, or Middle Fin School or Tall No Tail School, it's a new fish bowl and it's understandable if you tremor. Some of you may be feeling confident to take up your sticks knowing soon you shall be doing battle against the invaders. Many of you may be wishing you were still napping in the sea kelp.

You are not alone. We, too, would have preferred a longer snooze.

When I was a young tadpole, my family lived in the Sea of Northrend and my mother didn't have the pearls to send me to King Training Camp with the other Kings, so she taught me herself. Come typhoon or whirlpools, I wasn't allowed to rest in the kelp and I didn't like it. Many times I would curl my tail and fall asleep on the conch. Complaining wasn't allowed as Mum would say, "Rawgrlgrlgrlgrrgle, This is no Draenai dessert for me either, froggy."


On to important matters. We are here to tell you what is expected out of you and your training. As your Ruler, We give many laws that you are responsible to follow. The instructors are to challenge you to prevail or push you into the deep sea crevice and be done with you. Your parents will be filet'd if they allow you to watch shellavision and play Sea Chest. We have girgled about the Kingdom's responsibility for setting high standards, for armoring trainers and Cheiftians, and turning around Sea Schools that are not working to create graduates we like.

Yet as the sunsets, we can have the most dedicated trainers, the most forcible tadpole creators, and the best Sea Schools in the four Seas! None of these will stand unless all of you fulfill your responsibilities to avoid us destroying you. To avoid destruction, you must show up for training, pay attention to those enforcers; listen to all Tall No Tail Aged ones; and work hard to succeed!

That is what we want to drive into you today: the responsibility each tadpole, each Middle Fin, and each soon to be Tall No Tails has for your training. You have the responsibility to become awesome. Everyone has a special ability that will improve my kingdom. You must discover what that is and that is what the training will unlock.

Maybe you could be a great scroll creator - maybe even good enough to write my addresses to my kingdom -but you will never know it till you have written thousands of useless scrolls. Maybe you could be an innovator or an inventor - never mind - the gnomes have that covered - maybe you could build a gnome trap - but you will never know how until you have been trapped many times yourself and learned how they work. Maybe you could be a warrior or a chieftain - but first you must survive battle or a debate team. No matter what you want to do with your life - We guarantee if you want life - you will learn to be an excellent fighter. Learn your weapon well.

You can not drop out of Sea School. There is nothing below to go down to. There are no Draenai desserts for deserters. You must fight for it! Train hard and learn the craft of conquering! We do not ask this for your own life nor your future. The skills you learn will decide nothing less then the future of my kingdom. What you are training for will determine whether we as a kingdom will survive our greatest challenges of the future, the dreaded Draenai invaders.

Fighting and weapon skills will be beat into you. You will be taught how to use your environment. Fighting with dead fish and driftwood. Every single one of you will develop your talents, your skills and your strength, so that we can use you to solve our most difficult issues. If you don't do that - if you quit training - you will be seen as quitting our kingdom - and you will be pushed into
the deep sea crevice.

We know it won't be easy. We know many were abandoned once the eggs were fertilized. My father, too, left before we were hatched. There were times I went swimming after a Tall No Tail calling, "Are you my father?" My life was lonely with only five hundred siblings and trying to keep my crown on while my head was still too small... I wasn't always so focused. I did bad things but I was born king so it doesn't matter.


That is why today, we address each one of you, telling you what we have set for your goals and you must meet them. You might decide to avoid extracurricular activity, or volunteering to pull in the nets for dinner. Your kingdom will kill you.We also wish you all learn to take care of yourself, keeping clean, washing with sea foam often. Our people can not afford to get sea sickness so it is up to you to prevent the spread. Otherwise we will push you into the deep sea crevice.

Whatever you resolve to do, we want you to commit to it fully as we can not afford to keep pushing you all into the deep sea crevice. We realize that shellavision has allowed you to dream. Your trainers will crush them as dreams don't come true. You must work hard to rise. You won't love every fight but as you improve that too will change. You won't like every trainer but once you master them you will no longer care and you will take their place. Not every strategy will seem logical and you might need to re think it. Fear not. It is the Murloc way. Many of our great warriors were wimpy tadpoles in their day.You must learn from them.


If you can't lift your stick, don't give up. Spend more time building your strength otherwise your trainer will hit you with your stick. Never give up. No one is hatched swinging a dead fish. You must train. Don't be afraid to ask for a smelly one. They drop the enemy faster. Learn to work together. It helps overcome your weakness and becomes a strength. It shows you have courage to admit you need numbers. And even when you’re struggling, even when you’re discouraged, and you see other Murlocs have run off, don’t give up or you will die. Unless you, too, can run away quick.

The story of my kingdom isn't about you Murlocs. It's about me. You must try harder to keep my kingdom growing. You must love me enough to do no less then your best.We will write the tales of our battles. It's the story of Tall No Tails who swam where you now swim a long, long, long, time ago and went on to sacrifice themselves against the eight great white sharks. Eventually, the eight great white sharks were too full to go on living and died, therefore, ending the oppression.

So today, we require you to decide what you will contribute. What problems are you going to cause? What discoveries will you kick the sand over? Will we trouble ourselves to remember you? Or will we just push you into the deep sea crevice and be done with you?

Your mums and anonymous sperm donors, your trainers, your Chieftains, and We, your King, are doing everything to provide you with weapons and training. It is up to you to train and live or not train and we just push you into the deep sea crevice.

I expect all you tadpoles, middle fins, and almost tall no tails to get serious this year. Show me you do not wish to be pushed into the deep sea crevice. We expect to get warriors out of all of you. Don't let us down. Don't let your family down or they, too, might be pushed into the deep sea crevice along with you. The kingdom requires you all to prepare for war. NOW DO IT OR BE PUSHED INTO THE DEEP SEA CREVICE!!